Toby

I have two dogs, a jack russel cross bitch and a mongrel bitch (I think, can't recall).

Anyways, I used to have a third dog (my first or second actual dog), who was older than the other two (the jack russel cross is his daughter) and he was my childhood dog. I'd always accepted that I would outlive my Toby, but it doesn't mean I wasn't distraught when it happened.

He'd led a very good life to be fair, and he was always the animal that was there if someone was sad or depressed. I know that sounds a bit lame, but that's just how it is sometimes.

I never really speak out about death, be it people or animals, I keep it all pent up inside, but as I was letting the other dogs out tonight, I thought "There should be one more." Even though I know there isn't anymore.

Toby had to be put down, what must be a few years back now. He had a cist on his neck, which was beggining to irritate him. We took him to the vet to get it checked out, and were assured it was fine and would heal. Unfortunately Toby started to scratch at it, and then it bled an awful lot.

So he had to go back to the vet, and as it was late at night, we had to call one out to his office. Toby clearly knew that he probably wasn't going to come back as we were getting him in to the car. He accepted it in the end, and was completley lucid to the whole thing.

As we took him to the vet, he co-operated and then he jumped up on the table (he had an awful lot of energy for an old dog) and as the vet examined him, he said the best thing to do would be have him put down.

My stepfather asked me if I wanted a moment with Toby, but I declined. It was already hard enough on me. I stroked him and told him "goodbye".

Sorry, in the midst of writing this I started to get teary-eyed and gushed out. Guess it's something I repressed.

Anyways, to finish off, Toby was a great dog and companion when I was growing up. Very sad that he had to be put down, but it was for the best...

Guess this gave you ll a little look in to my life. Shall try and blog more often. I just knew that a single Tweet wouldn't cover what I wanted to say.